miércoles, 28 de febrero de 2018

Why do I want to live

Reality has me wanting nothing, my studies suffocate me, the pressure that I have to do everything on time and form surpasses me. I feel useless most of the time, I feel that I am a disappointment. There are bills to pay and little work. At least I no longer feel like a burden to my parents, but still.
I feel like I'm going to be stuck here all my life and that scares me too much.

These days I have to remind myself that I want to live. 
It's something that I forget very often.

 There are so many things I want to do, so many things that I want to know, and to learn, so many experiences that I need to live.
I have so many dreams that my heart starts to beat like crazy every time I think about them.
I want to travel so far that I want to forget everything and everyone at least for a moment. I want to feel that happiness of reaching a place where nobody knows me, and soaking in another language and another culture, meeting new people and then crying when I return home.
I want to be full of happy and sad stories, and I never want to lose this capacity and this privilege of being able to dream. 

Sometimes I concentrate too much on all the bad things that happen around me, and all over the world, and I am so sensitive that I cry without being able to stop, seeing so much injustice and so much pain, and that is when all my dreams totally lose their meaning.

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